I'm just going to share kind of an update of a few things for this post :
- I have a date for my thymectomy surgery! We've been meeting with the surgeon a few times over the last four months or so, and we had to keep putting the surgery off because of my husband's work schedule and family schedules. I'll be admitted to the hospital on August 12th for IVIG for a few days, and then the surgery will be August 15th. I'll be in the ICU for a few days after. The danger is not necessarily the surgery itself but if my body goes into a Myasthenic Crisis afterward and I'm not able to breathe on my own.
We don't know when I'll be discharged. I'm starting to feel some anxiety about it but I've also been waiting years to have this surgery. It's the best hope for MG improvement and I'm hoping it's my golden ticket to get something of a life back. I'm ready to be thymus-free and have this adorable, stuffed one instead.
I'm planning on writing a post before the surgery. I have a list of what I'm planning on taking with me and a list of goals I have after the surgery that I want to share.
- I'm doing a t-shirt campaign to help raise funds for medical costs and the surgery. There are only 2 days left to order one. I designed the shirts using my mantra I use every day, "Rise Above". I got the idea from someone I follow on Instagram. She did a t-shirt campaign to raise funds for medical costs and now whenever I wear the shirt she designed, I smile and remember how I got to help her out. Link is here
- I walked with a cane without help for the first time a few weeks ago. It was a big deal. Husband was trolling me by playing "Neverending Story" in the background. Next walking video will have "Eye of Tiger" as the soundtrack or my beloved Maxwell for some groove.
- I've had an intense constant migraine for over a month and nothing is helping. I started a different migraine injection so I'll share if it helps or not. One of my goals after surgery is to try a different treatment than IVIG. I love that it allows me to breathe on my own but it has turned my chronic migraines into one constant, screaming migraine that nothing can kill. I'm not feeling it. I did get to experience a barfpocalypse when I went to the ER to treat it two weeks ago. The man in the bed next to me was scream barfing, which would trigger barfing from the guy in the bed in front of me, which would trigger barfing from the woman next to him. The ER is always a party.
- Speaking of IVIG, there is a national shortage of the drug, and I have spoken with multiple people who have had their infusions either delayed or cancelled. It looks like it's a manufacturer problem, but it is still important for people to donate blood because each bottle of IVIG is derived from thousands of blood donations. A patient wrote an article about how to advocate for yourself during the shortage.
- Read this incredible story by a man who diagnosed himself with Dysautonomia in the 90s and pioneered some of the treatments still used today for this condition.
- Illness sometimes feels like endless days of muddling through and just surviving, but something I have been doing for awhile now that has really helped me is creating things to look forward to. I'm working on a list of things I'm looking forward to the rest of the year. They can be small things like a particular flower blooming in your yard or a favorite artist releasing a new album. Whatever it is that keeps you going. I'll try to share my list sometime too.
- I woke up yesterday, and my respiratory muscles were almost completely paralyzed. Luckily it's infusion week and my nurse, who is a gem, got my IVIG infusion started right away in the morning. She brought my BiPAP out to the living room for me. I started crying while I was trying to eat. It's really difficult to eat when you can't breathe. She was really patient. I woke up breathing a little better today. I just have one more infusion. After #3 is when the magic usually happens, and my diaphragm gets with the program and starts moving again. I'm so thankful I am getting home infusions now. Otherwise I'd be in a hospital bed right now. I have to be able to sleep in my own bed so my cat has someone to yell at and snuggle in the morning.
Maybe someday after the surgery I won't have to do IVIG and my BiPAP and I can separate. It's not me BiPAP. It's you. I don't need you anymore. We'll always have the memories.
Maybe someday.
I hope you are all doing ok out there, and I send you my love and some good grooves